My Personal Story
and motivation for my pursuit of wellness.
My Father Was Not a Man of Many Words –
But Every One of Them Cut Deep
His comments were most often brief, pointed and invalidating.
He taught me the value of a quick rebuttal, the fine art of hiding my true feelings to stay safe, and the pleasure of winning by deception or omission.
My father and I fought every chance we had, each of us enjoying the thrill of the battle, each of us cutting as deeply as we could to inflict the greatest pain. I was always at a disadvantage because my father inevitably played the ‘respect card’ – and I was forced to admit defeat or be physically hit or slapped.
I hated my father then…judging him harshly for his opinions and cruelty. He was relentless. He never lost, and he was never wrong. Always brutally honest, he acted to serve his personal agenda only.
It was not until I was in my mid twenties when I had an epiphany. It hit me one day while I was fuming about another one of my interactions with my father. I was walking angrily to my vegetable garden at the back of our rental property in Arlington, Virginia – and a crow cawed high up in a large, magnificent tree in the yard. Jarred out of my mental tirade, I shielded my eyes from the dappled sunlight, and looked up. The tulip tree was in bloom – and I starred at it for a long time, drinking in the beauty. It was then that I had my epiphany.
What else was I missing while I was planning my strategy for my next encounter with my father?
How much time had I already wasted on a senseless battle?
What was the point of the fight?
To prove I was right? (That was never going to happen because my father changed the rules or played his ace if I got close to winning.)
But was I any different from my father? I wanted to win also. I wanted to have the final word. I wanted to prove I was right.
In fact, I was just like him…
Now, that was a leveling thought.
I sat down at the base of the tree, and accepted the reality that I was doing exactly as my father was doing. I was fighting an endless and senseless battle – for what? There was nothing to win and truthfully anything that was left of our relationship would be lost at some point. Was our relationship worth preserving? Did I want to preserve it?
It took a while…but in the end, I decided that anything different would be better than the relationship we had. I decided to stop fighting to feel alive. And with that thought everything changed!
I can not say I actually forgave my father – ever – but I did come to have a great respect for him as my first and foremost Dark Teacher. My father taught me how NOT to live life. He taught me who I did not want to be. And for this I am grateful.
My father and I got along fabulously from that day forward. I let him win every battle, and he thought I had finally come to my senses, heard his wisdom and learned the error of my ways…and in many ways, I had.
I made peace with my father accepting him for who he was – exactly as he was without judgment. I alone cared for him until he died. He never thanked me for sitting by his bedside for more than four months. He died abusively cursing the doctors and the nursing staff with his last breath. At 90, my father was still true to himself. There were no surprises or epiphanies for him. Mine just kept on coming.
“Dad, your darkness showed me the way to the brightest light of possibilities. I am ever grateful for your presence in my life.”
Darkness has been a powerful teacher for me. I am not afraid to disappear into the depths of emotion or the direst of challenges. I’ve been there before, and I have fought my way back. No matter how dark the journey, the light of a deeper understanding freed me.
I feel I am uniquely qualified to walk with YOU into the darkness of your suffering and travel back out with the Truth of What Is to light the way back.
In fact, my calling is to assist YOU with the journey you must take to find your answers. I will go into the darkness with you and hold the light of understanding you need to make sense of your life.
There is no way out of your challenges except to go through them. The sad truth is that you can not ignore your challenges because they will fester in the darkest folds of your life inevitably infecting your every day.
Let me help you live a vibrant life, where your challenges are understood, your relationships balanced, and your choices meaningful.
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Everything I have learned about life and wellness has been compiled into the ‘Touch Stones to True Wellness’ online program for you.
Can you afford to NOT have your own epiphany
and break free of what keeps you from living
and loving vibrantly?
If you think you are NOT living the life you are meant to live
then something has to change.
Too many days have already passed
with you NOT being the Best You Can Be.
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“Corinne Ramage is a special teacher who combines spiritual wisdom with infinite compassion. She writes from a place that feels personal and healing to the student. Her thoughts are infused with informed and timely information that makes the pursuit of wellness attractive to all. She gives students a wide variety of options in her new program and creates a practical approach for anyone willing to be courageous enough to venture down the path to true wellness.”
Reverend Dan Costello, LCSW, spiritual counselor, NY
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I do understand your pain and suffering. I have traveled into the darkest challenges. Here is my own honest, gritty epiphany – the moment when everything changed, and I dedicated myself to being vibrantly well:
The Spiritual Healthcare Network
Touch Stones to True Wellness©
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